I have loved
to love
and be loved
when I knew nothing of the word,
other than
it was safe
and nourishing
because it was as boundless as the sky
but I didn’t know
it meant
to lose myself
everytime
I am so empty
still,
trying to fill myself up
with love
for me
and me only
because who else will there be
besides me
to pick up the pieces
and glue them back together
with my fingers covered in blood
if I have not
lost myself by then
And I’m starting to think
that this crucial love
stays
though it might not show up everyday
like the clouds,
it might hide in the little
crevasses
it still
stays
to knit the absence
over and over
again
so this love
I will cultivate
to beam as strong as the sun
so that
even when
I have shattered
so,
so horribly
I am glinting
rainbows
and I can stand
on my bare feet
with the strength
to walk towards it again.
to love
and be loved
when I knew nothing of the word,
other than
it was safe
and nourishing
because it was as boundless as the sky
but I didn’t know
it meant
to lose myself
everytime
I am so empty
still,
trying to fill myself up
with love
for me
and me only
because who else will there be
besides me
to pick up the pieces
and glue them back together
with my fingers covered in blood
if I have not
lost myself by then
And I’m starting to think
that this crucial love
stays
though it might not show up everyday
like the clouds,
it might hide in the little
crevasses
it still
stays
to knit the absence
over and over
again
so this love
I will cultivate
to beam as strong as the sun
so that
even when
I have shattered
so,
so horribly
I am glinting
rainbows
and I can stand
on my bare feet
with the strength
to walk towards it again.
Jade Butler is a Georgia-born writer and junior on summer vacation with plans to make writing her career.